Mark Twain

Familiarity breeds contempt - and children.

Don't say the old lady screamed. Bring her on and let her scream.

Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul.

Better a broken promise than none at all.

She was not quite what you would call refined. She was not quite what you would call unrefined. She was the kind of person that keeps a parrot.

Everything has its limit - iron ore cannot be educated into gold.

Grief can take care if itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.

Be careless in your dress if you must, but keep a tidy soul.

If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve man, but deteriorate the cat.

But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?